Category Archives: Discussions


Discussion: Perspective

What’s the biggest problem you’ve ever faced?
What’s the biggest worry or fear you have?
What’s the farthest you’ve ever walked? 

How did you feel when you were done with that walk?
If earth were the size of a golfball, then the sun would be big enough to fill a school bus full of golf balls

The next star out I want to talk about is betelgeuse. It’s twice as big as the orbit of earth around the sun. That’s the height of 6 empire state buildings on top of each other if earth were a golf ball.

The next star is the biggest we know about and is called canis majoris. If the earth were a golf ball, this star would be the height of mount everest.

Does that change how you feel about your worries?
Matt 6:31-33

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
The way we “seek first his kingdom” is just 2 commandments. 

Love the Lord with all your heart, soul, mind and strength and love your neighbor as yourself. (Mark 12:30-31)

-Cyndi (2/14/17)

Discussion: Nothing is Wasted

Have you ever heard someone say, “everything happens for a reason?”
What do you think that means? 

Why do people say it?

Sometimes people say it to comfort others, or to give hope. Sometimes people say it because they don’t know what to say. Most often, people mean it to assure others that a bad situation can be happening so that greater good can happen in the future.

What is free will?

Why do you think God gave us free will?

Everything does happen for a reason, but sometimes it’s a bad reason- and outside of God’s will. God can take a bad situation and make good come from it- but that doesn’t mean He wanted the bad situation to ever happen. He allows bad things, because he gave us free will. We get to make choices, and sometimes we choose wrong. Sometimes people choose really wrong, and the consequences can be life altering.

Matt 11:28-30“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Next time you have a friend hurting, remember that they may not want to hear that things happen for a reason- because some reasons are just bad. Remember that the God of the Bible is available, and wants to be our comfort. If you are hurting, and bad things have happened to you, look for the ways that God is reaching out to you. Through friends. Family. Youth Leaders. Find help, and help others. God won’t waste your sorrows.


Discussion: Integrity


  • What does it mean to have integrity?
  • Can you think of an example of a person who had/has integrity?
  • What sorts of challenges make it hard to be a person of integrity?

“Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.”

-Titus 2:6-8 NIV

  • Have you ever been accused of something bad, or having wrong motives, when you did not.

“The man of integrity walks securely, but he who takes crooked paths will be found out.”

-Proverbs 10:9 NIV

“But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. It is better, if it is God’s will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil.”

-1 Peter 3:15-17 NIV

  • If you are going to have to suffer for something, better for it to be for doing the right thing. 

(Prayer for us to grow in our integrity)


Discussion: Needs

  • What does it mean to be selfish?


(of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one’s own personal profit or pleasure.

  • What is vain conceit?





having or showing an excessively high opinion of one’s appearance, abilities, or worth.

“their flattery made him vain”

synonyms: conceited, narcissistic, self-loving, in love with oneself, self-admiring, self-regarding, self-obsessed, egocentric, egotistic, egotistical; More


Excessive pride in oneself. 

Philippians 2:3-4 NIV

[3] Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, [4] not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

  • What are some reasons people are selfish, what motivates someone to think of themselves first?
  • What do you think this group would be like if everyone worked hard to meet everyone else’s needs? What would your classroom look like? Your home? Your school? The world??
  • If everyone put others’ needs before their own- how would our own needs be met? 


Discussion: Boundaries – Part 1

  • How many of you have ever had a bf/gf or liked someone? 
  • What are some different types of boundaries?
  • Do you have rules for a relationship- whether you’re in one now or think you’ll ever be in one?
  • If you establish boundaries in a relationship, do you think it’d be best to make them as you go, or before?

Philippians 4:8 NIV

[8] Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.


Discussion: Friends

How do you make friends?
Think about the friends closest to you, why do you trust them?
Are you influenced by your friends? How?
Have you ever gotten into trouble because you went along with something a friend did?

Proverbs 13:20 NIV

[20] Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.

Think about the kind of person you want to be. Do your friends match that description? Chances are, how they act, and the choices they make will influence you. What do you want your reputation to be?

Guard Your Heart

  • What are safeguards?
  • Why do we have them?
  • Have you ever felt physically unsafe? Why?
  • What could have been done to make you feel safer?
  • Have you ever felt emotionally unsafe? Why?
  • How could you have felt safer?
  • Have you ever had your heart broken? 
  • When you are hurt or angry, can it affect how you treat people? Why?

Proverbs 4:23 NIV

[23] Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

Guarding our heart does not mean shutting the world out. Guarding your heart means having safeguards or boundaries. We have to protect our heart, and be cautious about how others treat us. The more we are hurt and broken down over time, the harder it is to heal. What are some ways we can guard our hearts?


Discussion: Alone

Have you ever felt alone, like you didn’t have anyone to talk to? 
Do you ever feel like people don’t understand you, or judge because you think differently?
Have you ever judged someone else, or made fun of them because they didn’t think like you?
Sometimes, when we feel like we are alone, it isn’t because people are avoiding us- it’s because WE are isolating ourselves. Sometimes we can convince ourselves people don’t like us because we are scared of what others think of us. We convince ourselves others avoid us, but the truth is WE are avoiding them. 

[9] Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: [10] If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 NIV

People need people. Sometimes it’s hard to find people we connect with, but we can’t hide ourselves from the world. We have a lot to offer, because God made us on purpose. Don’t hide out from the world- embrace how amazing you are, see how amazing others are, appreciate differences, and enjoy 🙂

Discussion: Golden Rule

Do any of you have pet peeves? What are they?

Who has heard of the ‘Golden Rule’? What is it?

Does that mean we should do EXACTLY for others what we like? For example, lets say I like having my hair messed with, but somebody else doesn’t- should I mess with their hair? I don’t like fish, but Ezra does- would it be very considerate if he made me a huge salmon dinner for our anniversary?

Sometimes we misinterpret the golden rule, or take it too literally. The golden rule comes from the book of Matthew in the Bible. Matthew was one of Jesus’ disciples, the book is his account of some of the things that happened while Jesus was on Earth. It says:

Matthew 7:12New International Version (NIV)
12 So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. 
When we do to others as we would have them do to us, that means knowing them. That means treating them with the respect, kindness, and love that we like to be treated with. I don’t want a salmon dinner. But I would love to have a meal prepared for me.
A lot of times in life we don’t think about how our actions may affect others. We get caught up in our own interests and likes, and we may even think we are doing someone a favor, when we really may be hurting their feelings or upsetting them. 
Did you know that your frontal lobes in your brain don’t fully develop until your early twenties? Your frontal lobes are responsible for understanding a longer term outlook- actions and consequences, problem solving and judgement. How many of you have ever acted on an impulse or curiosity, and had a bad outcome? What would have happened if you thought about the outcome- or how what you were doing would affect others? Would you have changed what you said or did? 
For each mile driven, teen drivers ages 16 to 19 are nearly three times more likely than drivers aged 20 and older to be in a fatal crash. I think that age demographic is interesting. You guys know right and wrong, but sometimes might act on emotions or impulses that have consequences you wouldn’t have predicted. It is important to be aware of your choices. To think about who you are affecting, and to ask someone with fully developed frontal lobes for help and guidance when you are faced with tough choices. The golden rule can be applied in so many areas of life. Every action, every choice you make, has a consequence. You can decide if they will be good or bad.


Discussion: Time Management

Who would say they tend to procrastinate?

Are there benefits to putting things off?

What are the downfalls of procrastinating?

Have you ever had such a busy schedule that you couldn’t afford to put anything off?

Have you ever said ‘yes’ to too many things, and had to go back and say ‘no’?

When you manage your schedule with intentionality, what are the results?

When we say ‘yes’ to something or someone, we are saying ‘no’ to something/someone else. That’s ok, as long as were aware of what we are gaining and/or giving up.

When we put off work for play, the result may be less sleep, more stress, or not doing a good job. Some people work better under pressure, or stay more focused when they don’t have other options- so what is being done in the mean time?

Our schedules don’t just ‘happen’ to us. In many cases, while living under your parents’ rules, decisions are made that you can’t control. But what are you doing with the time YOU manage? Are you using it wisely?

When you choose to be aware of what you are and aren’t saying yes to, you may find that you get more done. What changes can you make to more effectively manage your time?

“For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:

a time to be born, and a time to die;

a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;

a time to kill, and a time to heal;

a time to break down, and a time to build up;

a time to weep, and a time to laugh;

a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;

a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

a time to seek, and a time to lose;

a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

a time to tear, and a time to sew;

a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

a time to love, and a time to hate;

a time for war, and a time for peace.”

-Ecclesiastes 3:3-8


“All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.”

-Matthew 5:37

When we make plans, we need to consider the whole picture, not what sounds fun in the moment. A moment of fun can lead to many moments of grief. The right thing isn’t always the fun thing. If you over book, you may look flaky- because you are. When you say yes to something or someone, make sure you are REALLY saying yes.